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Can you ask for charisms as a gift from God? Yes! It involves developing in intimacy with our Heavenly Father and discerning the charisms He has bestowed upon us.

Seeing God as our Good Father


As we look at the idea of asking for charisms, it’s important to see God as a loving and generous Father. Sadly, not everyone has experienced positive father figures in their lives. However, our relationship with God rises above the limitations of earthly experiences. God is the epitome of perfect fatherhood, desiring to lavish His children with spiritual gifts that will contribute to the building of His Church.

The Importance of Asking


Seeking spiritual gifts requires us to ask, just as a child confidently requests gifts from their father. Asking for charisms not only demonstrates our trust in God’s goodness but also allows us to actively participate in His divine plan. Remember, asking does not guarantee immediate fulfillment, but the act itself draws us into a deeper relationship with our Heavenly Father.

Perseverance and Intimacy


Sometimes, God desires us to persevere in asking for a particular charism to foster a greater intimacy with Him. Because of this process, He molds and shapes us, fostering spiritual growth and building character. As we persist in asking, we learn to surrender our desires to God’s perfect timing and trust in His wisdom.

Dispelling the Myth of Deserving


Therefore, it is essential to address the harmful belief that we only receive what we deserve. We do not merit God’s love and gifts. He desires our growth and commitment to building up His Kingdom. Through the journey of discernment, we come to understand our call to serve as integral parts of the Body of Christ.

Moving Forward in Discernment


Additionally, to help you on your journey of discerning your charisms, explore Many Parts Ministries. There, you will find a wealth of resources, particularly a free PDF guide to all 24 charisms and a charism assessment to kickstart your discernment process.


Consequently, asking for charisms is an invitation to experience God’s love and participate in His divine plan. God is a good father who delights in giving gifts to His children. Finally, embrace the process of discerning your charisms and trust in God’s wisdom and perfect timing.

Learn more at Many Parts Ministries.

Jill Simons [00:00:00]:

Hello and welcome to Charisms for Catholics. My name is Jill Simons and I’m the executive director at many Parts ministries where we equip the body of Christ by helping people learn about and discern their charisms, which is really another word for spiritual gifts. When you discern your charisms, you’re able to see how the Holy Spirit is already active in your life and where he is inviting you to further build the church. Let’s dive in.

Jill Simons [00:00:32]:

Some of my recent episodes have gotten a little bit long. We are not looking to be a half hour show. I would love to keep it a lot more around ten minutes, but I have gotten really fired up in some of the last episodes. So you don’t want to quelch the spirit and I’ve just been going with the flow. But today we’re going to do a much shorter episode, hopefully if I don’t go crazy and talk about just some practical, a practical question, one practical question that we can keep nice and short and actionable for you, and that is can you ask for charisms? Great question. I love the verse that says ask and it will be given. Seek and you will find. And that is something that we should think about and be encouraged by a lot more frequently. God is a good father. We talk about that endlessly on this show and throughout everything that we do at Many Parts ministries. And this context of family is such helpful framing context for everything we do in relationship to God, but especially when it comes to charisms. And I know that I mix my metaphors sometimes that’s because there’s not a perfect one to one for everything. So charisms are like presents that you get on Christmas from God. Charisms are like your chores, but it’s weird for your chores to be your Christmas presents. So obviously we don’t want to overthink the interplay between the analogies, but we want to think in this episode about them as gifts, specifically like Christmas gifts or like a birthday present when you are interacting with your parent in a good parent child relationship. And that’s what an important side note for every instance of talking about this. I know that there is a heartbreakingly large sector of the population where the parent child relationship was not healthy and was not a helpful context for the spiritual life for so many reasons. Fear, abuse, anger, you name it. We are broken, broken people. And some have seen that brokenness more clearly than others in that parent child relationship. We want to always be returning to what is the reality of a good father. We are not talking about the fathers that did not reach the biblical ideal of a father. We’re talking about the source and summit of all goodness, God himself. And so we need to be mindful of many places that there’s a temptation to overlay our own subjective experience of a fallen human father with what god’s expression of fatherhood is. So that’s what I want to call our mind back to as we begin this analogy. We are not talking about a withholding, manipulative, frustrating, sinful, broken father. We are talking about the pinnacle of both manhood fatherhood and the goodness and space that comes from that expression. So when we look at can we ask for charisms? That’s like asking, can you ask your dad for a gift? Ultimately, your gifts that you receive are free gifts that the parent chooses to give you, right? You don’t compel your parents to give you a gift. But I don’t know any parts, even amongst my human fallen group of mom friends, that doesn’t ask their kids what they’d like for Christmas or what they want to put on their birthday list. This is a hallmark even of our fallen family relationships. It is very okay to relate to God with this same level of familiarity. Asking for what you want now that comes with the same I don’t know what word you want to use. The first word that occurred to me is baggage. But I think that has too negative a connotation. It comes with the same stipulations, maybe as asking for something or putting something on your Christmas list in a family. It’s not a guarantee that you’re going to get it, but your parent really wants to know what it is that you want. When my children put a snowmobile on their Christmas list, that was from a place of infinite hope, heroic hope, that makes me just feel so proud of their virtue. But there was absolutely no way that there was going to be a snowmobile under the Christmas tree for anybody, and they knew that. And this is the same thing we see with spiritual gifts, where there is an absolute opportunity for us to ask for it and receive it. That should be totally within our realm of experience and expected, but it can be equally within our experience to ask for something and not receive it in the way that we wanted to receive it or expected to receive it. Our context, our viewpoint and perspective is not the same as God’s, and his is always going to supersede ours. Most of the time, though, when you are asking for a good a spiritual gift, something for the upbuilding of the church, I see that prayer answered in the affirmative very frequently because God is desirous of his children building his church. That said, I think that it’s also very important sometimes for us to have to do the asking. I think that this is a lie that I’ve operated under for a lot of my life. That I did not realize how toxic it was, is this lie that we get what we deserve. So it was one of those things that would manifest in this idea that, well, if God didn’t just give it to me, then I probably don’t deserve it. This is something that when you take it to its logical conclusion, it should make it impossible for us to receive salvation, right? If we get what we deserve and the wages of sin is death, then death is what we deserve. And so God has clearly come to flip that on his head. And so there are times where I think God really waits to give us a spiritual gift. Specifically wanting us to ask for it, inviting us to have the space to actually articulate the desire that we have for it and the faith that God jill give it to us because he is a good father. And that can be a really important part of a lot of people’s spiritual journey is coming to a place of intimacy with God and comfort with God, where they actually ask for something, where they actually believe that they have that kind of relationship and that kind of intimacy where that is allowed. That can be a pivotal moment for people. And so I also want to encourage you if you are feeling held back by that, by the fact that, well, if I was supposed to have it, if God really wanted it for me, he would have already given it to me. That comes from a place of you get what you deserve and that comes from a place of earning, proving and performing, which is always going to be toxic to our true identity. And that’s one of those things where both things cannot be true at once. You can’t hold both of those beliefs at the same time. One has to win out in order for you to move forward in your life. You can’t have that kind of logical war going on in your mind. One of them is going to be what you really believe and one of them is going to be the just kind of blanket you lay over it. And so if you find yourself resistant to asking for a gift from God, it might be worth kind of seeing if there is that kind of lie operating under the surface and then recognizing the fact that this is 100% biblical that you’re told to ask and seek. And there’s that great parable that I love so much about the lady who is just so annoying that she gets justice. Part of me wishes that it was called the parable of the annoying lady. It’s our true experience, right? Even if a judge is corrupt and evil, if somebody is not leaving him alone about getting justice, he gives her justice not because he is just but just because he’s so dang annoyed. He just is like, what must I do to make this end? And the point of it being, of course, if this is what happens with an evil and corrupt human being, how much more can you expect God to be receptive to our perseverance? But also realizing that sometimes he’s inviting us into perseverance, like the perseverance that you build through. Asking is just as important to your ultimate spiritual walk as the gift that you’re asking for and recognizing that there’s value to both parts of the process. A lot of us have wounds around asking. There might be a situation where you were made to feel guilty for even asking the question, maybe in a school, maybe in your home, whatever the situation might be. And you might not realize that that’s a wound that you have. This is what we see throughout the spiritual life is that God a lot of times allows targeted things in our lives to draw attention to something. Not because he hates us and wants to punish us, like some people feel the need to believe, but because what gets identified is given the opportunity to be healed. And that’s ultimately what’s going on. He wants to heal all our wounds, and we are the main reason that that doesn’t happen. A lot of times we are in our own way, we are attached to our wounds in a twisted kind of way. And when we have wounds around asking, a lot of times he will put us in a position where we really need to ask to move forward. Not because he wants it to be frustrating and hard for us, but because he wants to invite us into that healing so that when we come out the other side, not only have we had a wound healed around, asking, we’ve get our identity partially, at least healed, if not fully healed, in our relationship to God and the fact that we can ask him for things. And we also ultimately may receive the spiritual gift we were asking for. And so look how much further ahead we are at the end of that process than if he had just given it to us right out of the box. So be encouraged. If there is a spiritual gift, if there’s a charism that you are hungry for that is not in your current arsenal, ask. Ask with perseverance. Trust the Lord. Know that you are his beloved child and ultimately he wants to do what is best for you. You might not always know what that is, but your asking is welcome.

Jill Simons [00:12:38]:

Thanks so much for joining us on today’s episode of Charisms for Catholics. If you would like to learn more about your charisms or begin your own discernment journey, head to our website@manypartsministries.com where you can download our free PDF guide to all 24 charisms and also begin your own journey by taking our Charism assessment.

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